Night Before Gastric Bypass Surgery

Today during all of my pre-op stuff I was encouraged to spend some time tonight journaling and taking my measurements.

It's hard to believe its tomorrow. I check in at 6:00 am. I started this process back in April and I have focused so much on getting to this point that it's a bit surreal that it's here.

I am hoping to lose 100 lbs and to live a life free of diabetes and foot pain Those are my main goals. I have high cholesterol that I've had since my early 20s and I'm not sure if that will go away. Time will tell.

I look forward to the day when I won't be embarrassed of my weight. The time where i ran into an old boyfriend and he didn't recognize me because i had gained so much weight. That's embarrassing and makes you feel terrible. Or the numerous times when traveling in thailand and they would go get a sturdier chair for me. Or the time when Chris and I were taking pictures in Puerto Rico and I sat and broke a chair.

I will be happy to not have to worry about insulin injections for diabetes. I haven't had that but practically every family member over the age of 50 on my moms side has. With my current trend, it was just a matter of time.

I hope to be a strong role model for my children. "I can do hard things" and they can too.

My concerns are of course gaining the weight back. Also how it will feel not being part of the "big person club". There is a certain camaraderie among those that are overweight. And persons among that circle may not feel comfortable around me. I have already experienced this somewhat with comments that have been made about me doing this surgery.

Overall, tonight I am not nervous. I feel well educated and know that I am in good hands. I can hardly "weight" to see what the future will bring my way.